I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
