Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
