i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
