Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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