The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
