so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
