another moral hangover. fuck.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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