you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
