I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
