So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
