i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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