Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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