he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
