If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize