Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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