I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
