How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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