butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Randomize
