how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
