you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
