there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
