I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize