dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
My feet surprised me
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