yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
