we have pet lesbian snakes
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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