Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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