covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
