Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
