I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
