I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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