Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
