did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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