New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
