so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
