so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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