He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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