I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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