i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
