Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just want nice things and good sex
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
