he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize