Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
