so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
