Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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