is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
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