You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
