i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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