i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I'm too high and old for this...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
