After last night, I could never be a politician.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
