if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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