Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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