I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Randomize
