Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
